Every toddler parent have the same struggle of why they tantrums, even the most composed parent can be stressed by a toddler tantrums. A large-scale study of nearly 1,500 children – published in the Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics – revealed that between ages 3 and 5, around 84% of children display some tantrums, with 5% having daily screaming sessions. So, what’s the reason behind the toddler tantrums? And what can you do to stop it?
Table of Contents
What are Toddler Tantrums?
Toddler tantrums are a normal part of childhood development, and they typically occur in children between the ages of 1 and 3 years old and usually last for a few minutes. However, in some cases, tantrums may last for up to an hour. Children may cry, scream, kick, hit, or bite during a tantrum. They may also hold their breath or curl up in a ball on the floor. Tantrums are often caused by frustration, fatigue, hunger, or boredom. They may also be caused by a child’s inability to communicate what they want.
Why Do Tantrums Occur in the First Place?
Tantrums occur for a variety of reasons. One of the most common causes is frustration. Toddler often tantrums when they can’t have something they want or are unable to do something they’re trying to do. For example, when they’re trying to put on their shoes and can’t do it or when they’re trying to reach a toy that’s out of their reach.
Other common causes of toddler tantrums include fatigue, hunger, and boredom. Children who are tired or hungry are more likely to throw a tantrum than those who are well-rested and have had enough to eat.
Tantrums may also be caused by a child’s inability to communicate what they want. For example, a child may experience a tantrum when they want their parent to pick them up but can’t say the words.
How to Make Toddler Tantrum Less Likely
Can you prevent tantrums entirely from happening? No. But you can do a few things to make them less likely to occur.
One of the best ways to prevent tantrums is to provide your child with choices. For example, instead of asking your child what they want to wear, please give them a few options. This will help them feel like they have some control over their environment and are less likely to have a tantrum. It’s also essential to keep your child on a regular schedule. Make sure they’re getting enough sleep, eating regular meals, and having plenty of time to play.
If your child is tired or hungry, they’re more likely to tantrum. So, it’s essential to keep them on a schedule that meets their needs.
Finally, it would be best to be consistent with your rules and expectations. If you allow your child to do something one day but not the next, they’re more likely to tantrum. It’s crucial to be consistent with your rules so that your child knows what to expect and can follow them easily.
How to Handle Tantrums When They Do Occur
If you’ve followed the tips above and your child still throws tantrums, don’t worry. It’s normal for children to temper occasionally, even if you’re doing everything right. You can do a few things to help calm your toddler down when tantrum happens.
● Keep your composure
First, try to stay calm. It can be challenging to remain calm when your child is screaming and thrashing around, but it’s essential to do your best. If you shout or get angry, it will only worsen the situation.
Instead, try to speak in a calm and soothing voice. This will help your child feel safe and secure and may help them calm down more quickly.
● Distract your child
Next, you can try to distract your child from whatever is causing the tantrum. For example, if they’re tantruming because they want a toy they can’t have, offer them another toy to play with instead.
If that doesn’t work, you can try hugging them or holding them close. This will help them feel loved and secure and may help to calm them down.
● Give them time to cool off
Sometimes, the best thing you can do is let your child tantrum. It may be tempting to stop them or get them to calm down, but this will usually only worsen the situation.
Instead, let them tantrum until they’re ready to calm down on their own. This may take a few minutes, or it may take an hour or more.
● Acknowledge their feelings
Finally, it’s essential to acknowledge your child’s feelings. Tantrums are usually caused by frustration, so it’s important to let your child know that you understand how they’re feeling.
For example, you can say something like, “I know you’re frustrated because you can’t have the toy you want. It’s okay to be upset, but we need to calm down now.”
This will help your child feel understood and may help them to calm down more quickly.
How to Help Your Child Cope With Tantrums
Tantrums are a normal part of childhood, but they can be difficult for both children and parents to deal with. If tantrums are a regular occurrence in your home, you can do a few things to help your child cope with them.
● Talk about tantrums
While it may feel awkward initially, talking about tantrums with your child is essential. Explain to them what a tantrum is and why they happen. That will help them understand their emotions and may make it easier for them to control their temper in the future.
You can also talk about how you expect them to behave during a tantrum. For example, you can explain that it’s okay to feel mad or upset, but they need to stay calm and not hit or scream.
This will help your child know what to expect and may make it easier for them to follow your rules.
● Teach them how to express their emotions
In addition to talking about tantrums, it’s also important to teach your child how to express their emotions. This will help them understand their feelings and make it easier for them to control their temper.
There are a few different ways you can do this. You can teach them to use words to describe their emotions, such as “I’m feeling frustrated because I can’t have the toy I want.”
You can also teach them to use positive self-talk, such as “I can handle this” or “I’ll feel better soon.”
● Create a tantrum plan
Another way to help your toddler cope with tantrums is to create a tantrum plan. You and your child can follow this specific plan when a tantrum occurs.
The plan should include things like staying calm, what to do if they start to feel mad, and what to do when the tantrum is over.
Having a plan will help your child know what to expect and may make it easier for them to follow your rules.
Conclusion
Tantrums are a normal part of childhood, but they can be difficult for both toddler and parents to deal with. If tantrums are a regular occurrence in your home, talk to your child about them and teach them how to express their emotions. You can also create a tantrum plan that you can both follow when a tantrum occurs. With a bit of patience and understanding, you and your child will be able to get through this challenging phase.
Thanks for reading & leave a message if you are experience the toddler tantrums as well!
About Me
Hi, there. I am Lin. Together with my husband and two kids, we live in the beautiful Netherlands in Europe. I am dedicated to self-development, creating quality time for the whole family, and fully supporting kids with their potentials with all I have learned from engineering, MBA, and 10+ years of working experience in the energy sector.
